CHILD TRAINING 101

I should probably title this post Parent Training 101 since that is where child training actually starts...and I've yet to figure out when the course ends! I have been a parent for 18 years, 6 months and 8 days and I am still being trained and re-trained. So often, I feel like I am failing the class -- I know the material but choke on the test. Take the subject of consistency, for example. I know what I should do but have such a hard time following through. In my quiet time yesterday morning I was reading Proverbs 19. Verse 18 admonishes us: "Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death." (NIV) That really caught my attention and I spent some time looking at this verse in other translations and its cross references.

The second part of that verse, "...do not be a willing party to his death" sure makes an impact. Proverbs 13:24 tells us "He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him." Proverbs 22:15 says, "Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him." The "rod" may be literally an instrument used to administer a spanking or it may be a figure of speech for discipline of any kind. These verses tell me that discipline is rooted in love and parents are urged to apply the rod of punishment so that the child will not follow a path of destruction. If we neglect this responsibility we are, in effect, knowingly looking the other way while our child takes the wrong fork in the road which puts him in harm's way.

It is not easy to discipline our children -- I do not enjoy it. It is exhausting and draining. I give in too often to their whining and crying because it takes too much effort to be "the bad guy". When this happens, their behavior and character suffers for it. That same verse, Proverbs 19:18, in the King James Version puts it this way: "Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying." When I stick to what I know is best for them, not taking the "easy" way out for me, the results are worth it.

Another subject in this Parent Training 101 course is my own track record of obedience. I need to examine how well I have obeyed the authorities in my life. Was I obedient to my parents as a child? Do I submit to my husband? Does God direct my paths? Do I confess my failings in these areas? The example of respect and obedience that I set for my children is observed by them all day long. Yikes. This is a huge responsibility and I stumble more often than not. But the best thing about stumbling is landing on my knees, which is the best place to be when I'm training my children.